Unexpected things no one tells you about uni

I know I can’t be the only one who went into uni with really high expectations, only to be let down because it wasn’t at all what I thought it would be (or maybe it’s just the course I’m doing). Here are unexpected things no one tells you about uni:

1. It can be very lonely sometimes

This is probably the biggest one for me. I went into uni so excited, ready to have the best time ever and always be with people (similar to school). But my experience, and I know a lot of other peoples experience with uni, is very different to school.

If you don’t click with a group of people, trust me you are not alone. Sometimes there are people you click with, sometimes there aren’t.

It can be very isolating seeing groups of people who have really clicked, when you’re here struggling to make that same connection with even just one person, never mind a group of people.

At first I thought there was something wrong with me. I was trying so hard to fit in and make friends, and wondered why people were already becoming such close friends and I was struggling.

But after 2 years (I’m in my third and final year now) I realised that these people were nice, but we didn’t have many things in common, so that’s probably why it wasn’t naturally happening.

It’s hard to make friends when everyone wants to go out drinking all the time and you don’t. So you will either find people who are the same as you, or you wont. But don’t beat yourself up about it.

I thought to myself, I would rather sit by myself, than sit with a group of people trying to fit in or be fake, only to feel more left out than if I were to sit by myself.

I became very content and happy within myself, that I didn’t feel like I needed anyone. And since then I’ve made more uni friends than I did in first and second year combined.

2. It’s extremely independent

There is no academic staff checking up on how you’re getting on (unless they are timetabled to meet you). No one is hounding you to getting your assignments in on time. It’s all you.

You have to be extremely independent, and make sure that you are on top of your work, your emails, your deadlines, because no one is going to do that for you.

This one was a shock, as all throughout school and sixth form, there were teachers constantly reminding you of what you needed to be doing. So going from sixth form to uni was a massive change.

The staff are not always in. In school, it’s almost guaranteed that if you needed to speak with a teacher, they would be in their classroom or in a staff room, always accessible. But uni, I can never find who I’m looking for.

To get a hold of the staff, you need to email them (unless you know exactly where they will be at a certain time of day). So you can’t expect fast answers.

3. You have to be VERY organised

You are in charge of your own timetable, your attendance, your work, literally everything. If you aren’t organised and you don’t stay on track and keep up with your schedule, you will quickly fall behind.

My tips:

• By a planner at the start of the school year and write down your full timetable.
• Take your planner everywhere and write any new dates or lessons that won’t be on your timetable (this could be meetings, informal events etc).
• Write everything in your calendar on your phone as well. If you accidentally forget your planner, then you will always have your phone with your schedule in you calendar as a backup .
• Write your deadlines in BOLD in your timetable so you don’t forget them.
• Every week at the top of your planner, write down how many weeks left until your deadline, so you can keep track of how long you have to do all of your work.
• If you want to go out with your friends, write that in your planner and make sure that it wont effect your workload too much. Or rearrange the time you planned to do work to accommodate going out.
• Have a separate notebook for writing notes or anything that pops into your head.
• Give yourself a fake deadline one week before the actual deadline. This helps so that you’re never going to be late or stressed about a deadline, because you have given yourself a week, in case you fall behind.
• Check your emails every day. You get emails randomly, and not checking your emails for a few days could mean that you miss something really important.
• Make a big to do list for the week of what you want to get done and break that down into little to do lists every day to achieve those.

My favourite planner: https://www.hellodayplanner.com/

Some more tips on staying organised, as well as lowering stress and anxiety at uni: http://bigsisterera.com/how-to-reduce-stress-and-anxiety-at-uni/

4. You will get lower scores than your used to

I know this isn’t the same for everybody. But going from being the best at a subject in school, to uni where everyone was the best at that subject, you start to undermine yourself and how good you really are.

Being thrown into total independence can be very hard to adjust to, and the lack of organisation, as well as motivation can really effect your grades.

Missing a lecture and then having to catch up, so you miss another lecture (and the cycle repeats) can affect the outcome of your grades. You just need to stay organised. (But missing one lecture or class won’t be the end of the world, as you will see in my next point).

To be brutal, you will either come out of uni, feeling really passionate and inspired about the subject. Or uni will have totally killed any love you had previously for that subject.

5. A lot of lectures will be pointless

Honestly, you will be sat in a lot of classes, thinking:

1. I already know this

2. This is common sense

3. I could learn myself this in 30 minutes rather than 2 hours

I heard someone say this once, and I’ve never related more. They said ‘sometimes you have to skip uni, to do uni’. And it’s so true. Sometimes you have to think to yourself, this class is always a waste of my time when I go, so I’m going to skip it and spend the time wisely, doing uni work.

(And then you can look through the slides or ask someone if there was any really important information you really need)

6. It’s not like the TikTok’s you see (unless you make it that way)

I used to watch TikTok’s of people in uni, and they made it look so fun, and I felt sad because my uni experience wasn’t feeling like that.

But I promise you, although every uni is different, you have to romanticise your time there. Think of it as a challenge, to always have a day that’s worthy of a TikTok.

This could be doing various things, my favourites being:

• Getting a fun drink
• Making a smoothie to carry with you https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/collection/smoothie-recipes
• Listening to a podcast or music on your way there. (You can look at my favourite podcasts in this post: http://bigsisterera.com/what-you-need-to-do-if-you-hate-your-boss/)
• Wearing a cute outfit
• Having aesthetic stationary that makes you look like THAT girl
• On your lunch breaks do something you enjoy. (Read, watch a episode of your favourite show, go into town for food) I have some book recommendations here: bigsisterera.com/book-recommendations/

7. It’s expensive!

You will have to learn how to budget your money.

Not only are you paying a large amount to be there. There’s further costs on top of that such as:

• Transport
• Food
• Extra equipment that the course doesn’t provide
• If you moved out then you’ll have bills and new home ware you need to buy
• Societies cost money. They have an entry fee, and then depending on what society you are in, there could be further costs (uniforms etc)

Overall, uni isn’t for everybody. Some people have amazing experiences, others do not (me lol). So if you’re in that position, just try to enjoy the little things. Don’t worry or stress to much, because life is about enjoying yourself. And remember there will be other people that feel exactly the same. You are not alone.

If you have any other unexpected things you found out since going to uni, do share down below!

Let me know if this has been similar to your uni experience or if yours is totally different!